


histories

by avulle



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-15
Updated: 2015-08-08
Packaged: 2018-04-04 11:49:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4136364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avulle/pseuds/avulle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pearl (pearl) is born in what would have been the year 100,492 BCE.<br/>(She is not older than the entire human race—but only just.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. pearl

**Author's Note:**

> For posterity: This fic was written just before the second Steven Bomb; the most recent episode was episode 57, 2x08: "Reformed".

Pearl (pearl) is born in what would have been the year 100,492 BCE.

(She is not older than the entire human race—but only just.)

She is the seven billionth pearl, give or take a couple hundred million.

(By the time of the great war she will be the seventh oldest, the vast majority of her older brethren long dead.)

She is born (created) on a planet already in the process of collapsing under its own weight (the Earth before Earth), crawling her way out of the dirt, one of the seventy-three million gems born that day alone.

(Kindergarten is nothing more than a proof of concept—and does not even begin to approach the true level of devastation gems are capable of inflicting on a planet that has earned their collective ire.)

The planet lasts a total of three more months before being drained completely of everything that made it unique, and is then abandoned like the worthless piece of scrap that it is.

(Pearl does not know if there were sentient beings on the planet prior to the gems’ arrival, but she suspects the answer is _yes_.)

 

She is a faceless gem among many, ordinary in (almost) every way.

Two eyes, arms, legs, and ears—one mouth, nose and torso.

(One gem, placed solidly in the palm of her right hand.)

 

She is trained to be an engineer (to be a mechanist), just like every other pearl in existence.

She does well in her training, but is nothing spectacular.

Hardly anything to write home about.

(Hardly the legend she would one day become.)

 

Her first kill is an overzealous ruby who pushes her just a little bit too hard.

( _What do you know, you’re just a—_ )

She is found, just under two hours later, white spear she should not be able to summon hanging loosely from her right hand, and a shattered ruby ground to powder before her.

(There is red power in the legs of her pants, smeared all over her boots.)

Her blue eyes are cold, and her gaze uncaring, when the violanes comes to take her away.

(She holds her right hand out, fingers splayed and gem on display, as if begging them to break it for her.)

 

She dismisses the plain white spear, and goes peacefully.

(The entire way the violanes are deathly silent, and give her a wide berth.)

 

She isn’t executed because murder is hardly an executable crime.

They instead give her combat training, and she is good.

(Not spectacular.)

But she makes a much better fighter than she ever made an engineer (she has neither the patience nor clarity of mind to deal with the fiddling inner working of Homeworld’s most complex machines), so they let her stay.

(She is not the only murderer who is casually made into a mediocre soldier.)

 

They are not prepared for who she will become when they put her onto a battlefield.

(For who she will become when they tell her it’s okay to shoot for the gem.)

(To go for the kill.)

She is suddenly the best fighter of her generation (of her planet).

(She is suddenly the most terrifying soldier they have ever produced—)

(A soldier whose expression does not change, even as she drives her plain, white spear deep into the gems of her enemies.)

She comes to be called a great many things, but chief among them is _monster_.

 

She fights for them for tens of thousands of years, her skill ever-growing (her face an ever-unchanging mask of indifference), and never questions a single order.

(She is the greatest soldier they have ever had.)

Her pale blue skin comes to be flecked with every color of the rainbow—iridescent and beautiful (an angel of death).

(Each time she is forced to regenerate, her skin is briefly clear once more—)

(Before gem powder ingrains itself into her skin once more.)

 

Time passes, things change.

Rebellions grow more frequent, and the empire comes to fear those who are too singularly powerful.

(Who could do too much damage if left unchecked.)

They come to fear her—her ever-unchanging mask of indifference, and her flawless martial efficiency.

(They stop bringing her to homeworld for briefings for fear she might just—)

(Snap—)

(And wipe out the government in one fell swoop.)

 

They steadily give her fewer and fewer orders of importance (less orders in which she can kill—)

(Less orders in which she can shape history—)

And they accidentally make her a person.

(She travels the stars, reads libraries beyond number—)

(She finally finds passion in something other than the gem powder ingrained in her skin.)

 

There are three more rebellions, each more devastating than the last—

And then they shunt her off to an unused corner of the galaxy, demote her to the engineer she hasn’t been in close to one hundred millennia.

(The engineer she hasn’t been because machines make her skin _itch_ —)

(Makes her want to kill something.)

(Makes her want to destroy everything she can get her hands on.)

 

She is placed under a newly created rose quartz, one whose gem is in her navel (symbolism so blatant not even a gem could miss it), with a large body that is large and soft and overflowing.

(A body that is not given to the war that she was made to wage.)

 

She expects a _What do you know you’re just a—_ , but instead Rose is kind and soft and beautiful (Rose listens when Pearl speaks), and suddenly, Pearl’s skin doesn’t itch so badly, anymore.

(They destroy planet after planet, mothers to millions of gems that never know their faces.)

 

Rose talks a lot about beauty, about love.

About the importance and the sanctity of life.

(Her words are soft, but they cut deeply.)

(Pearl begins to spend much of her time alone.)

 

_I’m sorry._

_I don’t know what I did._

_Please, forgive me._

(Pearl stops spending so much of her time alone.)

(Rose’s words do not stop hurting, but her hands are warm and soft and wonderful, and they almost soothe away the pain.)

 

Then—

 _My Pearl_.

(Whispered in the dark of space, pink lips pressed into pink hair—)

 _You’re wonderful_.

(For the first time in her life, Pearl finally feels like she’s something important.)

(Something good.)

 

Time passes.

Pearl grows smaller.

Rose grows larger.

(They come to _fit_ , even better than before.)

 

Then, suddenly, there is _Earth_.

A planet filled with color and teeming with all varieties of life.

(For the first time in her short life, Rose hesitates.)

(For the first time in her short life, Rose _questions_.)

 

Kindergarten comes to fruition.

Plants and animals die by the millions.

( _Humans_ die by the thousands.)

(They scream as they die.)

 

Then, once more—

_My Pearl._

_You're wonderful._

(The war begins.)

 

Pearl doesn’t want to fight.

Pearl wants to leave it to other gems—

(Gems who do not burn the brightest when they are coated in the powder of their brethren—)

But—

Pearl doesn’t get to have a choice.

(Rose is not made for war.)

Pearl’s skin becomes iridescent, once more.

 

When Rose first sees her, shining like the angel of death she has once again been forced to become, her eyes widen first in surprise, and then her face crumples in understanding.

( _Oh, Pearl_.)

( _I’m so sorry—_ )

( _I never knew_.)

 

Rose tries to convince her to wash ( _Please, you’re better than this—_ ), but Pearl refuses—

(Pearl knows well the power of fear.)

(She never expects to become a symbol for hope.)

 

Pearl refuses to leave Rose’s side—already knowing what happens when she delegates the protection of Rose to _other people_.

So it is only natural that she bears Rose’s standard.

(Pearl stops being the _monster_ and becomes the _flagbearer_ —)

(The single greatest symbol of the rebellion.)

 

The war continues.

A truly mind-boggling number of gems are reduced to powder (broken so thoroughly not even Rose’s tears can heal them), but Rose continues to stand tall (Pearl standing tall by her side), even as healing tears stream down her face.

(Pearl's eyes are dry.)

 

The empire tires of the war, and makes an executive decision.

(Rose is still naive, and never imagines just how far the empire is willing to go to end the rebellion.)

(Pearl doesn’t see it coming fast enough.)

 

They are drawn out into a final battle, outnumbered three-to-one, and make a final stand.

(There is little hope for victory, but if Rose manages to survive, then they have not yet lost.)

(The galaxy warp is destroyed, and their gems can always be put back together.)

Their last general falls, both of her gems fractured almost in two (but not quite), and, on a whim, Pearl banishes the fractured ruby and sapphire into her gem.

(It distracts her just enough—and she takes a sword to through the chest for her troubles.)

(The world goes dark.)

 

Pearl awakens to Rose's arms warm all around her, and nothing but ashes for miles beyond that.

_Pearl._

Rose clutches Pearl to her chest.

 _Oh_ , Pearl.

And Rose weeps.

(They are tears of relief, Pearl notices, and not tears of sorrow.)

 

For a long moment, enveloped in Rose's arms like she is the only gem in the universe, Pearl considers not telling Rose about the two gems she is hiding in her gem.

(The last two gems besides them, she is sure, that still exist on this planet.)

She imagines, for a long moment, the two of them alone, together, for the millennia to come.

(Rose's soft arms wrapped around her, Rose's soft everything enveloping her—for the rest of eternity.)

Then she raises her hand to Rose's where it has wrapped completely around her, and deposits the two gems she has hidden (the two gems she saved) into her palm.

 

Rose cries out in joy, weeping with eyes wide open, and pulls her closer, closer—

 _Pearl_ —she says, breathlessly, pressing kisses to the coarse hair on Pearl's head— _Oh, Pearl._

Rose enormous bulk wraps fully around her, enveloping her completely—

_You are wonderful._

Closer, and closer—

 _I love you so much_.

(Moonstone is born.)

 

When Pearl opens her eyes once more, Rose laughs and smiles and presses her lips to—

Pearl's gem.

_You’re so beautiful—_

Pearl opens her palm, and, for the first time in her life, she finds it empty.

 _My_ Pearl.

(Her hand is light, for the first time in her life, and her body is balanced.)

(Beside them, a ruby and a sapphire lie silently, unfractured and fully healed.)

 

The empire's forces do not return.

(Pearl knows it is because they fear this planet, blaming it for the rebellion, believing that it is the Earth that is special, and not Rose Quartz.)

 

It is Pearl who finds Amethyst, years and years later.

(She does not know why she decides to go on that particular day to the place that started it all—)

(But she has never regretted that it is her that finds Amethyst, and not Garnet or Rose.)

 

Amethyst is small and strong and so very, very lonely.

( _Who are you, what are you doing here!_ )

She screams, and kicks, and screams, and kicks—

And then she curls into a ball, and hides in a tiny, Amethyst-shaped hole, and weeps and weeps and weeps.

(Pearl scoops her up, and takes her home.)

(Amethyst beats tiny little fists against Pearl's chest, before she fists her hands tightly in the front of Pearl's dress, and cries once more.)

 

Pearl spends most of her time curled up in Rose's arms while Rose strokes her hair, and they watch the sky.

(Sometimes they fuse, sometimes they don't.)

(Rose runs her fingers over Pearl's skin every day, and tells her how soft and wonderful and beautiful she is.)

 

The first gem monster appears three millennia after the war is over.

(It doesn't come to their attention for another two centuries after that.)

(They never know how many humans it managed to kill, but Pearl is fairly certain that it was a not-insignificant portion of the human race.)

 

Pearl kills it, even though she does not know what it is.

(It has a gem, and even though her spear is no longer plain, and white, she is still one of the best destroyer of gems the universe has ever seen.)

When she returns to Rose, Rose does not allow her back into her arms, her face frozen in horror and sadness and fear.

( _Why_ —Rose whispers to nobody at all— _Haven't we given_ enough _?_ )

 

Amethyst finally learns of her heritage, and her permanent smile falters, and breaks.

(Of all of them, it is _Amethyst_ who likes humans the best, and learns their languages and customs to play with them—)

She crawls into Pearl's arms, sniffling and nuzzling closer and closer, and—

_Pearl, why—Pearl—_

Opal is born (smaller, even, than Garnet, round and rainbow-colored and tiny).

(Opal curls into a ball, and goes to sleep.)

 

Pearl awakens speaking tongues, knowing more about the human race than she ever cared to know before.

(She loops her arms around Amethyst, and finds comfort in her presence in the absence of Rose.)

(She is very soft.)

 

They do not let the subsequent monsters loose for as long as they did the first (Pearl is nothing if not efficient), but the monsters still leave trails of blood and destruction in their wake.

(They are never fast enough.)

Rose retreats further into herself, and Amethyst further into Pearl.

(Garnet spends her days staring into space, all three eyes furrowed, looking for something none of the rest of them can see.)

 

Three centuries later, Garnet drags them to the great barren ashen wasteland in which nothing still grows.

She sits them down, points them at an uninteresting stretch of desolation—

And then, the wind blows, the sun shines just right, and a gem grows itself out of nothing.

(It then grows itself into a monstrous beast, and Rose tells Pearl not to hurt it.)

(It almost kills them all, and Pearl ends up killing it all the same.)

(But Rose's depression breaks, and she grabs Pearls hands and smiles—)

( _We can bring them back._ )

(She says it with such wonder, her face split into the first smile Pearl has seen in centuries, tears of joy streaming down her face—)

(That Pearl almost believes her.)

(But not quite.)

 

Pearl returns to Rose's arms, and Amethyst returns to the humans.

(Rose’s arms are soft and warm Pearl is reminded how much she enjoys being so small, once again.)

 

Every several months, Garnet will take them to the site of their last battlefield, a gem will emerge from nothing, and Pearl will kill it.

(Humans stop dying, and Amethyst starts to smile again.)

(Rose paces and roams the halls of their old abandoned fortresses, and Pearl sits in the libraries and reads.)

 

_Don't kill it!_

_Make it return to its gem._

(They almost die, once again, but this time, they succeed.)

(It is Amethyst who manages it, and when she is finished, she beams up at them, so very, very proud.)

(Rose wraps her up in an embrace, spinning her around and around until they are not two silhouettes, but one.)

(Pearl feels a twinge in her chest until the new gem looks at her, scoops her up, and whispers how proud she is of her into Pearl's hair.)

 

The new gem reaches out with the single hand that isn't holding Pearl, and a deep red something crawls into existence, and wraps itself around the gem they just defeated.

(Garnet’s voice is worried, as she speaks over Pearl’s head, but new gem’s voice is not.)

(It is brimming with enthusiasm, and all the confidence of the single general who led the only successful rebellion the empire has ever seen.)

 

Time passes.

(The hope that shined so bright in Rose’s eyes fades.)

(No gems return from the dead.)

(Pearl holds Rose as she cries.)

 

Humanity learns to write, and Pearl finally finds new reading material.

(She decides that maybe humanity isn’t so bad, after all.)

(Even if they are almost always wrong.)

 

More gem monsters come, and Pearl learns to fight without killing.

(She is not much more than mediocre, but nobody dies, and no gems are broken.)

 

Then, in the blink of an eye—

Suddenly, there is Greg.

(A round, human-shaped ball of softness and hair—)

(Who is so filled with hope it shines all around him—)

(Blinding to watch.)

 

It infects Rose, and Pearl truly wishes she could hate it—

(But then Rose smiles at her like she hasn’t smiled in millennia, and she cannot.)

 

Then—

_Please, Pearl, please understand._

Rose falls to her knees before her.

_I’m begging you, please._

_Don’t make me do this alone._

(Pearl starts to hate Greg, just a little bit.)

 

Pearl relents.

They fuse.

(Pearl understands.)

(She hates it.)

 

Through Moonstone’s eyes, Greg is the (second) most beautiful thing Pearl has ever seen.

(He is brighter, even, than she imagined.)

(The part of her that is Rose says—)

( _Don’t you see?_ )

(Everything looks better through rose-colored glasses.)

 

Greg’s eyes open as Pearl sits up.

He is thankfully not touching her, his arm instead tossed casually over (onto) Rose’s massive form.

Their eyes meet, for a long moment.

_Pearl?_

He reaches his hand out, fingers halfway extended—

She meets him halfway.

(His skin is not quite as soft as Rose’s, but it is so very, very warm.)

Their fingers brush together once, twice, and then Pearl fluffs out the gossamer around her shoulders, and exits his van.

 

Steven is born.

(Rose ceases to exist.)

Pearl screams and cries and tears Rose’s room into pieces.

(She only makes the mistake of having it make Rose for her once—)

(And never again.)

 

When Pearl looks down at Steven for the first time—

Tears she did not know she could shed, streaming down her face—

In his tiny little roundness, she does not see Rose.

(She sees Amethyst.)

 

The next years are both very short and incredibly long.

(Pearl learns that she is not as patient as she always imagined.)

 

She blinks, and then there is a homeworld ship on the horizon—

Too tough for the quartizine trio to scratch, bearing down on them like the literal hand of God.

(Then Garnet is in pieces before her, a homeworld gem has rammed their face into Steven’s temple, and—)

(Pearl sees red.)

 

Her spear hardens in her hand, elegantly spiraling tip hardening into a simple point.

(She has crossed half the distance between her and the homeworld gem in the barest hints of an instant—)

(Now perfectly unbalanced for the first time in seven millennia.)

 

She is stopped by a wall of water and a screamed—

_IT WAS YOU!_

(Her spear does not shatter because Lapis Lazuli is Lapis Lazuli and not Rose Quartz—)

(But it slows her down just barely enough.)

 

Pearl’s vision goes black.

(If they had been anywhere but on that shore—)

(They never would have been able to stop her.)

 

When Pearl wakes, she is immeasurably glad that her palm is clear, and her head is heavy.

(When Amethyst finally speaks from behind her, her voice shakes.)

 

Amethyst asks her what they’re going to do (looking to her for direction for the first time in a very, very long time).

Pearl tells her the truth.

( _I will show them that they were right to be afraid._ )

(They have already taken Rose from her, and she will not allow them to take anyone else.)

 

They win.

_That could have gone a lot worse._

_Could’ve gone a lot better, too._

 

That night, Amethyst finds her way into Pearl’s room—small and round and short-haired, once again.

(She opens her arms, and makes grabby motions up at her, so Pearl takes her into her arms.)

 _I’m sorry_ , she whispers into Pearl’s neck.

(Pearl doesn’t have the heart to tell her that she is not the one who needs to apologize.

 

Opal returns.

(Opal sleeps.)

Life goes on.

 


	2. garnet

Garnet (garnet) is born at the first brush of Ruby and Sapphire’s fingers.

She is the singular point where they overlap—the harmony of their individual melodies.

Her first feeling—her first emotion—is the buzzy, heady sensation of nervous excitement.

(And then she is gone.)

 

She becomes stronger as Ruby and Sapphire grow closer, lying between them when they lie together (the song only they can create).

She is there when they embrace for the first time, the line where their bodies meet.

She is there when they kiss for the first time, the shape of their interlocking lips.

She is there when they dance for the first time—the twist and turn, push and pull, the negative space between them.

 

With every iteration, Garnet grows in size, grows in strength.

Brief instants of clarity—

Affection, passion, lust, and love.

(Rage, hate, frustration, and forgiveness.)

She is everything they feel when they feel it for one another.

 

They begin to consider fusing, and Garnet grows stronger still.

She becomes a thread, tying them together when they are apart.

She is Ruby’s worry when they are separated, Sapphire’s quiet anticipation the moments before they are reunited.

Garnet is in their every thought, as they think of one another.

(She is their first _I love you_.)

(It is the first words she speaks—the first words that belong to her and only to her.)

 

The first time they dance with intent, she is their third partner, the music that they dance to.

She is the rhythm their steps spell out on the crystalline floor, and their nervous palms, pressed together.

(She is the bubbly excitement of _This is the day_ —)

And then she is their sadness, and frustration, when they fail to incorporate her into their motions, and fall apart, distinct.

 

She is their wondrous joy when, millennia later, Sapphire sweeps Ruby into her arms, and then she suddenly—

Just _is_.

(Suddenly they are parts of her, and it is wonderful for a brief moment before she is parts of them, once more.)

 

The thread that is _Garnet_ becomes a string, which becomes a rope, which eventually becomes a thick, heavy chain.

(They begin to have trouble being apart from one another, and Garnet is their deep longing—their desire to be one, once more.)

 

The second time they bring her into being—

Full and whole—

They are quiet, nestled in one another’s arms, their every thought consumed so entirely of _her_ —

That they flow into her without even needing to try.

(Garnet is finally able to open her eyes, and the world is _beautiful_ , so bright and colorful and new.)

 

They spend more and more of their time together, where she is the silent negative space between them, and then more and more of their time _together_ , where she has eyes and a nose and a mouth (when she can sing and dance, and laugh and play), and then—

And then Garnet _is_ more than she is not.

(The war is in full force, but Garnet does not care, altogether too happy to be alive—)

(The world too wonderful and vibrant all around her.)

 

Rose embraces her on sight, her arms warm as she whispers soft nothings into Garnet’s hair.

(Pearl stares up at her blankly, silently examining her before shifting her gaze back down to the battle plans Rose has been given but does not understand.)

_You are so beautiful_ , Rose says. _I always knew you would be_.

(She is warm and soft and oh-so-familiar.)

(Garnet remembers her, the way her soft melody tangled with her own, always rubbing up against it, and asking it to play.)

(Pearl is familiar, too, a harsh staccato that has been buzzing on the edges of her senses for longer than she can properly remember, only now finally given form.)

(For all of its harshness, it is comforting, like white noise in the night, or the roar of a waterfall.)

 

She is weaker than Ruby, slower than Sapphire.

(She cannot level mountains, cannot take artillery shells to the chest, and cannot move fast enough to vanish from sight.)

She is only one person, one melody, where they are two.

(She cannot be in two places at once, cannot hold two fronts of a single battle.)

So she is their private joy, their hidden pleasure—

Their reward for a battle well-won.

(Not their secret weapon.)

Garnet is not made for war.

 

She is more patient than Ruby, more proactive than Sapphire.

(She is capable of both waiting and acting, the eye of their hurricane—a single calm point.)

She is both of them and neither—their weaknesses and strengths brought together.

(She believes herself to be little more than the sum of her parts—)

(Until suddenly she finds that there is more to a harmony than a single melody standing alone.)

 

She sees Rose, in pieces before her, Pearl screaming, face twisted in despair, before she blinks and they are working calmly at their desk once again.

(A diaspore enters the room, and she attacks without thinking—already knowing exactly how this will end.)

 

Garnet learns war.

(She is weaker than Ruby, slower than Sapphire—)

(One person where they are two—)

(But she can see every path of every battle, make a plan for every contingency—)

Together, her and Pearl are unstoppable.

(They don’t stand a chance.)

 

Ruby’s first companion is a tanzanite—

(A tanzanite that she has not seen in millennia—)

(A tanzanite that would have never fought this war.)

Sapphire’s first companion is a ruby who is not _Ruby_ —

(With whom she made Lazurite, and not Garnet—)

But Garnet—

Garnet’s first companion is Pearl.

(The monster, the flagbearer, the weeping angel—)

(A gem whose eyes are hard and fierce—)

(Who fights even though she knows they can never win.)

Over battle plans and holographic battlefields, her sharp, harsh melody tangles with Garnet’s harmony—

(Almandine comes into being.)

 

They enter their final battle—

(Their final bet, their final hope—)

And Garnet sees nothing but blackness.

(The last thing she sees is Pearl’s face shining with all the colors of the rainbow, the symbol of their rebellion in one hand, and death in the other, tears streaming down her face as the chain that binds Ruby and Sapphire together finally breaks.)

 

After that, for a very, very long time, Garnet does not exist.

(The world is nothing but blackness.)

 

Then, with an explosion of feeling, she suddenly does, once more.

(She is panic, relief and desolation—)

(Sapphire’s _No, no, no, don’t do this to me, please_ —)

(Sapphire’s _I need you_ , whispered into a gem that does not stir with life—)

 

Three days later, she is the line where Sapphire presses herself against Ruby’s half-formed outline—

And then she just is, once more.

(Within her, Ruby and Sapphire are wrapped around one another, and she is their love and affection and overwhelming happiness.)

(Rose smiles at her, and Pearl does not stir from where she is nestled within Rose’s arms.)

(Pearl’s skin is a pale, pale blue, and does not shine in the light.)

(All around them is ash and devastation, and Garnet knows that the war is lost.)

 

Pearl raises her head, hours and hours (days and days) later, and her eyes are empty (devoid of life).

(Where Garnet has always seen focus, and grim determination—the willingness to do whatever it takes—)

(There is now nothing.)

(Garnet’s partner is dead.)

The gem that now lies in her forehead glints in the sun—

A pale imitation of the rainbow she once was.

(They stand, and the horizon is not the same as she remembers it.)

 

When they arrive at the spire, it is empty.

Room after room—

As if everyone simply up and left.

(Garnet does her best not to think about all the gems that they left behind—)

(She does her best not to think about all of the pearls—)

(With forehead gems and pale, pale blue skin—)

(That now surely exist no longer.)

 

Garnet spends her days watching the stars that she will never visit (but whose melodies she knows by heart).

(Pearl and Rose spend their time together, and they do not spend it near her.)

Occasionally, the sky alights with white fire, and it beckons to her (its harsh, staccato rhythm achingly familiar) until she finally answers its call.

(It warms her from the inside out, wrapping its fingers up and around her, and asking her to play.)

(As if drawn by Garnet’s imitations of her melody, Pearl emerges from with the spire, and in her eyes, Garnet can see a hint of something she has never seen before.)

(Pearl’s melody brushes up against her own—)

(Now the soothing softness of the river, and not the harsh crashing of the waterfall.)

 

The next morning, Pearl returns, arms filled with a purple something that Garnet does not recognize.

(A purple something that Garnet did not see coming.)

(That Garnet did not bother to see coming.)

The purple ball wails, curls two hands around Pearl’s neck, and pulls her close.

(Over the purple ball’s head, Pearl’s eyes are soft and not focused on her.)

( _Shhh—_ )

( _It’s okay._ )

( _Everything’s going to be alright._ )

 

The purple ball unfolds into a purple person, and—for a single moment—Garnet can hear it.

(A five part harmony—)

But then Rose wraps her arms around the tiny purple person, laughing and kissing her face while Pearl colors and looks away, and it is gone.

( _You are everything we were fighting for_.)

 

Time passes.

Slower for her than for Rose, much slower for her than for Pearl—and just a little bit faster for her than for Amethyst—

But it passes just the same.

 

The white fire of the heavens continues to beckon to her, and she continues to answer its call.

(Pearl sometimes emerges from the spire to watch her increasingly accurate imitation.)

(Sometimes not.)

(Almandine is born again.)

 

Garnet doesn’t use her sight because she doesn’t know she has to.

(They are safe, she believes.)

(For the first time—)

(She believes that she is safe.)

(So she does not look to the horizon for the blood and death she knows is always a possibility.)

 

It is her, of course, who sees the beast first.

And it is only her who knows that it is not the first of its kind.

(Nor the second, or even the third.)

(Her sight is finicky, occasionally breaking its own rules and showing her what it cannot.)

The others believe that in the three millennia they spent hiding in their spire, playing with the closest packs of humans, that there were no gem monsters roaming the earth around them, destroying everything they could find, leaving nothing but ash and devastation in their wake.

(Garnet does not have the heart to correct them.)

 

For the first time in three millennia, Pearl draws her weapon.

It is no longer plain white, stark and ugly, but instead a beautiful instrument—tip spiralling gracefully and shining brightly in the sun.

(Not the weapon of the monster, but a weapon that would have been truly deserving in the arms of the flagbearer, and of the weeping angel—)

It does the job just the same.

(Garnet’s first companion returns.)

(Garnet finds that she does not welcome the change.)

 

Although Rose’s melody softens, crooning out its sadness, and Amethyst’s melody sharpens, crying out its confusion—

They have nothing on Pearl’s.

As Rose turns her away, whispering _Why_ , and Amethyst runs to her, weeping _I don’t understand_ , Pearl’s melody breaks, and loses its rhythm.

(The soft melody of the river breaks.)

(The harsh staccato of the waterfall does not reform.)

 

Pearl is strong.

Pearl is powerful.

(Pearl is the reason they are not all dead.)

Garnet resolves to make a world where she doesn’t have to be.

(It doesn’t do any good.)

 

Garnet looks and looks but finds nothing.

The gem monsters arise, then pillage, burn, and destroy.

They follow weeks in the monsters’ wake, walking over salted farms and the bodies of more fragile creatures.

(Rose retreats further into herself.)

(Amethyst retreats further into Pearl.)

(Garnet looks and looks, but finds nothing.)

Pearl’s melody continues to break, and its rhythm continues to fail her.

(Garnet does not want to know what will happen when it finally falls apart.)

 

Three centuries later, it finally does.

There is nothing special about the day that it happens.

Pearl and Garnet are on top of the spire, sitting close but not touching, when—

Everything finally stops.

Pearl’s eyes drift closed, her blue skin fades to white, and her entire body goes limp.

(Her pearl becomes lackluster.)

The final dredges of the river—the final trickle of water—just stop.

Pearl tumbles over the edge of the spire, and—

Garnet isn’t fast enough to catch her.

(Sapphire is.)

(Almandine opens her eyes.)

(Almandine sees all.)

(Garnet remembers.)

(Pearl does not.)

 

Pearl returns to them—

Her eyes still only half-focused, and her gem still lackluster—

( _Drip, drip, drip_ )

But returns to them all the same.

(Amethyst notices.)

(Rose doesn’t.)

 

Garnet meets Opal.

Four-armed, but not much larger than she—

A harmony made of a single melody playing two parts.

(Her eyes are purple, and Garnet cannot see anything but Amethyst behind her eyes.)

Opal remains until the day Garnet knows Pearl will return, and Garnet takes them to the site of their last stand.

(A gem grows itself out of nothing, Rose looks up— _Oh,_ Pearl—and finally realizes what’s she’s been missing.)

 

_Don’t hurt it!_

(Rose wraps her hand around Pearl’s, her melody all around Pearl’s silence—)

(Garnet hears Moonstone’s harmony for the first time—)

(Pearl returns as a torrent of sound.)

 

Garnet’s first companion returns in full.

(A face filled with focus, grim determination and the willingness to do whatever it takes—)

(Who fights even though she knows they can never win.)

 

Then the monster traps Amethyst under one of its twenty-five arms, and it is suddenly dead.

(For an instant, Garnet can feel the roar of Pearl’s blinding rage.)

Then Pearl’s melody cracks, just like Garnet has heard it crack a thousand times before, and—

_We can bring them back._

Rose interrupts it, and it softens into the smooth melody Garnet never realized she had been missing.

_Okay_.

(Rose clutches Pearl to her chest, and Rose meets Garnet’s eyes over Pearl’s head.)

(Her face is twisted into a mask of horror.)

( _What almost happened._ )

(Garnet, once again, does not have the heart to tell her the truth.)

 

Garnet meets Moonstone.

(She unfurls out of Rose, massive, four-armed, and beautiful—and smiling as if today’s the happiest day of her life.)

(Her harmony—smooth and soft and all-encompassing—tangles into and around everything it touches.)

(The five part harmony returns once more.)

 

Pearl starts reading again.

(Pearl starts reading for the first time.)

Pearl starts talking again.

(Pearl start talking for the first time.)

Garnet finally meets the gem beneath the monster.

(The gem beneath the symbol.)

She is nothing like Garnet expected.

(Garnet loves her all the same.)

 

Rose researches while Pearl reads, and learns how to bubble gems.

(Within her, Sapphire recognizes the technique, and abhors it—)

Amethyst finally manages a bloodless victory.

(Pearl’s skin remains clear.)

(The soft smoothness of Pearl’s melody doesn’t break.)

 

Pearl grows weaker.

(Garnet grows stronger.)

Life goes on.

 


	3. Ruby

 Ruby (Ruby) is born in what would have been the year 37,789 BCE.

She is a Homeworld Gem, borne organically from the First Gem.

(It is a glorious honor, and Ruby is the highest of royalty.)

She is the four hundred twenty-second Ruby.

 

She becomes a soldier because she can.

(She becomes a soldier because she is _good_ at it.)

She becomes a foot-soldier because she is unstoppable.

(Her one weakness the delicate, square-faced gem that she displays proudly on the back of her neck.)

Ruby is an unstoppable force that has never met an immovable object.

 

Ruby’s first companion is a Tanzanite.

Born three cycles before her, long and sharp and full of edges—

Fragile like she’d shatter if Ruby touched her wrong.

(She is a politician, effortlessly likeable—always capable of saying the right thing.)

(She is everything Ruby is not.)

 

They spend the centuries between wars important enough to have a Ruby on the front lines in houses of glass, careful to never throw any stones.

(Capital is beautiful in the sunset, and their house reflects it beautifully.)

Between them lies Agate, their point and counterpoint.

(They never fuse.)

 

Ruby first summons her gauntlets in her sixteenth century of existence.

They are bright red, harder than diamond, and completely indestructible.

(They are useless, and do not do anything she could not do already.)

 

She and Tanzanite talk a great deal about unimportant trivialities, watching the galaxy spin above them.

Together, they carve crystals, decorating an empty house and attempting to fill the void that Agate can never quite fill between them.

 

They stay together because life is eternal, and they have nothing better to do.

(They stay together because life is eternal, and they have nothing they love more than one another.)

They are happy, if woefully incomplete.

 

In the background, the great rebellion gains traction, taking the closer border planets, and the empire loses territory for the first time since the schism.

(The eternal war finally becomes important enough to have a Ruby on the front lines.)

(Tanzanite lobbies for war.)

 

The rebellion's soldiers are weak, but never-ending.

They do not have a single proper Gem to their name, all mass-manufactured imitations whose only purpose is to wage war.

(The empire loses more territory by the day.)

(No diamond can hold back a mudslide.)

 

Ruby is an undefeated one-gem army on the battlefield.

Her massive fists scatter lesser gems by the dozens, and their inferior weapons fail to even scratch her skin.

Her very presence threatens to turn the tide of every battlefield she is placed upon.

She is an unstoppable force that has no immovable object to pose as its counterpoint.

(Until, very suddenly, it does.)

 

The first time Ruby sees Pearl, she is standing tall, with moonlight shimmering off her skin and off of the air around her, and Ruby does not recognize her for what she is.

(The weeping angel, the monster, the eternal soldier—)

(A pearl, the only gem that can only be mass-produced, the only gem that the First Gem has never seen fit to bear from within itself.)

She instead sees a goddess of death, the very First Gem brought to life, finally returned to take back the Life she has so generously gifted.

(Ruby finally understands why the empire has yet to call in and air strike on her, and take her down from half a planet away.)

Ruby doesn’t fight back because she doesn’t realize she should be fighting back until long after it’s too late.

(Her gem shatters, and the world goes black.)

 

Then she is opening her eyes, and the world is different than it once was.

Tanzanite is immediately before her, long arms wrapping around her—and lifting her off the ground.

_Oh, Ruby_ , she whispers into Ruby’s hair.

_I thought we’d lost you_.

(Tanzanite holds her closer than she ever has before, and it’s the closest they ever come to fusing.)

 

Tanzanite has to kneel to place her back on the ground, and Ruby doesn’t need a mirror to see the deep fissure in her gem.

(The wind blows across it, and she can feel the air seep into places it should never rightfully be.)

The colors around them are too bright for her eyes, and the sunlight reflects against her eyes to illuminate Tanzanite’s face.

(The first gem’s presence is warm behind her, and she is glad to be alive.)

 

_The war?_

_We won, of course._

(The empire can never lose.)

 

The military assumes that she has lost her strength with her size, and do not call upon her services.

(They are wrong, but she does not disillusion them.)

(When she thinks of war, she can no longer see anything but the face of the weeping angel, beautiful even when it is twisted in agony.)

She and Tanzanite find themselves a nice, peaceful corner of the galaxy, and while away their eternities carving away a planet.

(It is well into the third millennium of a new era.)

(Ruby has been dead for longer than she has been alive.)

 

Tanzanite remains exactly as important as she should be, taking long trips to homeworld, keeping the schism from reasserting itself once more.

(Keeping a very particular gem far, far away from the people she has shown no compunction about slaughtering indiscriminately.)

 

One millennia becomes two becomes ten.

(Ruby and Tanzanite name their planet Agate, in honor of the gem they know they will never create.)

Their planet becomes a thing of indescribable beauty, unmatched throughout the empire.

(Ruby comes to be an artist for far longer than she has ever been soldier.)

 

Sometime during Ruby's seventeenth millennium of existence, she carves something new.

(Something different.)

Something that has never been carved before.

(Something that no one has ever carved before.)

Ruby creates life.

(Agate is eaten alive, consumed from the inside out.)

Sapphire is born.

 

When the military calls for Ruby's return, Tanzanite goes with her.

(Every time they face each other, Agate lies pitted and gutted between them—a shell of her former self.)

Two years later, Tanzanite returns to homeworld.

(Ruby doesn’t stop her.)

 

Watching Tanzanite go hurts more than the fracture in Ruby’s gem, more than the mirrors in Ruby’s eyes.

(More than anything has ever hurt before.)

It does not hurt as badly as being with her.

 

Ruby becomes a teacher—teaching those much smarter than she to do that which she did by accident.

(She roams the stars, carving the same pattern again and again and again.)

They take what she did and study and refine it a hundred, a thousand, a million times over.

Their results are extraordinary.

(They are never quite able to reproduce Agate.)

Ruby becomes obsolete.

 

Ruby meets Sapphire (sapphire) two millennia later.

She is long and elegant, soft everywhere that Tanzanite was sharp.

She never pushes, and always yields.

(She is everything Ruby is not.)

(The hole that was once Agate pulls and tears at Ruby’s chest.)

 

Sapphire is a soldier, who stands tall and proud on battlefields against rebellions Ruby can no longer bring herself to care about.

She is faster than any gem Ruby has ever seen, and her weapon of studded sapphire knuckles by far one of the most terrible.

(She wears them over white gloves, a marriage of elegance and brutality that embodies everything she is.)

The first time Ruby sees her smile, she is surrounded by the gems of her enemies—sun shining brightly off of the sapphires in her knuckles—and she is completely untouched.

 

Ruby spends her days being silently useless, carving crystals that do not grow into gems, and watches the empire fight wars it cannot lose.

(At some point she is unable to pinpoint, the hole where Agate once was becomes filled with something else.)

 

When Sapphire touches her, she touches her gently, as if she is worried that she will break, with a mouth that is twisted in worry, and eyes that are hidden by heavy bangs of white hair.

(Eyes that she only shows Ruby when they are alone.)

It is the same way Ruby touched Tanzanite, once upon a time, and the way Tanzanite never touched her.

(Ruby finds that she likes it, so she does not tell Sapphire that she can take a space shuttle to the chest—)

(That she has, and has been left unharmed.)

Garnet is born.

 

In Sapphire’s presence, and Sapphire’s presence alone, Ruby unties the band she has tied around her forehead.

(Sapphire doesn’t even flinch, her face illuminated three ways by the mirrors on Ruby’s face.)

( _I love you_.)

(Garnet sings with joy.)

 

They kiss, they dance, they lie together.

(They try to fuse, but are unable.)

(They never talk about why—)

(The answer to obvious to bother.)

 

In their second millennium together, Sapphire returns from the battlefield in her gem.

(Ruby takes personal offense, and returns to battle for the first time in twenty-one thousand years.)

(She is exactly as unstoppable as she always has been.)

 

When Sapphire draws herself from her gem, her form is small and slight—only barely larger than Ruby—and Ruby is more scared than she has ever been.

Her hands shake as she takes Sapphire’s in her own—

But then Sapphire pulls her bangs up ( _No, baby, it’s okay_ ), and three blue eyes stare back at her.

( _See?_ _It’s alright_.)

Ruby is no longer capable crying, but, at that moment, she wishes she could.

(Ruby becomes a soldier once more.)

 

In their ninth millennium together, they encounter a couple in a space station on the edge of colonized space.

One of them is very large, and the other fairly small.

The large gem smiles brightly at them, while the small gem looks through them with blank eyes.

(It is the second time Ruby sees Pearl.)

(She, once again, does not recognize her.)

Rose Quartz brings Pearl's right hand to her lips, and presses her lips to the pearl she finds there.

_Pearl._

(The last pearl was made by the rebellion's godless machines, just before the end of the last Great War—mass-produced, weak, and fragile.)

(A gem so imperfect, it can never come about through natural means, defined entirely by its fragility.)

(It has been twenty-five millennia, and Ruby has never heard of a pearl that lasted one.)

 

Three days later, the world's colors dim, and soften.

(A dull ache that Ruby has long since stopped noticing vanishes.)

The world snaps into place.

(Garnet is born again.)


	4. sapphire

 Sapphire (sapphire) is born in the year 18,457 BCE.

She opens her eyes to towering miles of pitted, blackened crystal—

Something that was once beautiful, but is no longer.

(Sapphire is one of the last gems to be born of Agate—)

(The planet of miracles.)

 

She does not become a soldier.

(Not at first.)

She is a miracle child—(not proper, but only just)—so she does as she pleases, and no one tries to stop her.

 

Her first companion is a ruby (an almost-Ruby).

(The first gem she laid her eyes upon—)

(Love at first sight.)

 

Ruby loves war, but only in the abstract.

She enjoys telling great stories of war, conjuring her massive axe and defeating invisible foes with a sweeps its massive blade.

(She is small, and thin as waif.)

(Sapphire cannot resist her.)

 

Ruby reads, and then tells rambling tales, staring up into the stars above them.

( _The schism_ , Ruby cries, _The great war—_ )

Sapphire listens, but only with half an ear—

Distracted by the smooth face of Ruby’s gem beneath her fingers.

(Ruby sighs contentedly and continues her tales.)

 

They fuse, easily and often.

(Ruby’s tales become redundant, but she tells them all the same.)

( _The schrism_ , Ruby cries, _The great war—_ )

( _Agate—the planet of miracles._ )

Lazurite dances and sings and tells epics to the heavens.

( _The planet that finally united us all_.)

 

Ruby and Sapphire spend their days in libraries and crystalline parks, happy and content.

(Then Ruby finds a book she wasn’t looking for—)

(And finally sees the price for their existence.)

(For the first time, Sapphire sees Ruby cry.)

 

In the book is a world of endless beauty—

Crystals, erected into soaring towers—etched with the epics of old—

Stones, intricately carved into the forms of alien life forms long dead—

An entire planet, carved into a work of art.

(Agate.)

(The planet of miracles.)

They are the miracle children.

 

Ruby is different, after that.

She doesn’t smile like she used to, doesn’t cry out her war epics to the heavens.

(They visit Agate, together.)

(They stand side by side, and look upon the neighboring holes that they left in the face of a hero.)

(The black scorch marks and death that they left in their wake.)

(Sapphire holds Ruby as she cries.)

 

Then, for a great long time, they do not do much of anything at all.

Waiting and watching—

Staring at the dark infinities above them.

(They are the miracle children.)

(They are free.)

(They have never been given purpose.)

Lazurite dies a slow death.

(Sapphire becomes a soldier.)

 

Sapphire meets the Ruby that is not her Ruby (the Ruby that will become her Ruby), seven centuries after that.

She is small and stumpy, and—

Not beautiful.

Her edges are hard and messy, and her mirrored eyes reflect the worst of the light around them, throwing all she looks upon into ghastly shadows.

(Her color is not-quite-right, and there is something _off_ in everything about her.)

(Something wrong.)

Before every battle, Ruby sits with the generals, and they listen when she speaks.

(She speaks only when spoken to, and even then, only sparingly.)

 

They have no points of contact until they suddenly _do_.

(By chance, through a closing door, Sapphire sees a cavernous geode—)

(Each stalactite carefully and delicately carved into figures of indescribably beauty.)

(Sapphire blinks, and then looks down into the mirrored eyes of her creator.)

(Her creator stares back.)

 

 _Garnet_ , Ruby informs her as she walks on a carefully carved path deep into the depths of the geode.

_I’ve named her Garnet._

Sapphire instinctively reaches for Ruby’s hand, and Garnet explodes into existence.

(They do not touch again for a very long time.)

 

After an indeterminable number of years have passed, Ruby leads Sapphire deep into the bowels of Garnet, up until the stalactites are no longer carved, and the floor is no longer smooth beneath them, and then she leads her deeper still.

At the end of the endless tunnel, Sapphire finds herself faced by a history of all that Ruby has told her to be true.

(Within it is an exquisitely carved figurine of deep red, whose edges are smooth and perfect, and whose color is exactly as it should be, beside a figurine of deep blue, that is long and sharp and not much like her at all, with a soft red sphere lying between them.)

(Lain against the corner is a plain white spear that is carved from something that is not crystal.)

Ruby picks up the sphere, and Sapphire finally recognizes it for what it is.

(For a moment, Sapphire can see nothing but a room filled with spheres of all colors of the rainbow—)

(She can see nothing but the broken forms of gems who had been locked away for millions of years.)

 

She is returned to the present by the touch of Ruby’s fingers against her own.

Ruby’s mirrored eyes stare up into her own—her features twisted into expression her face cannot quite accomodate.

_I’m sorry—I just wanted to—_

_No, it’s not your fault_.

She sinks to her knees, and holds Ruby’s face in her hands.

(They kiss, for the first time.)

(It does not burn the image of broken gems from her mind, but it doesn’t hurt, either.)

 

The next day, Ruby appears in her room, her hands wrapped carefully around something that is not hidden within a colored sphere.

She carefully sets it into Sapphire’s hands, and—

 _This is life_ , Ruby tells her. _Destroyer of worlds._

(It is by far the most beautiful thing Sapphire has ever seen.)

 _This is all that is left of Agate_.

Her hand finds its way to Sapphire’s.

 _The agent of its destruction_.

(Sapphire understands why Ruby keeps it in a bubble.)

 

Time passes, and they grow closer.

Touches become kisses become something more—

Then something more become dances in the silent night.

(Ruby refuses to look at her when they dance, her eyes too focused on her own feet.)

(Afterwards, her hands reach for the back of her neck, and she looks away.)

 

Sapphire tries to convince her that it doesn’t matter.

(Sapphire tries to convince herself that it doesn’t matter.)

She never succeeds.

(Ruby takes off her headband, and Sapphire doesn’t have to fake her smile.)

( _I love you_.)

( _You’re beautiful_.)

 

Garnet wraps herself heavier and heavier around Sapphire’s heart—

And Sapphire begins to falter in battle.

(Too distracted by the lack of Ruby beside her.)

She sees a flash of her own gem, shattered beyond repair, and she flinches—just enough.

(Her physical form vanishes with a soft poof.)

 

 _No, baby, it’s okay_.

 _See? It’s alright_.

(Ruby smiles in a way she has never smiled before.)

(Garnet trills though their fingers, and comes one step closer to the surface.)

 

Sapphire hears of what happened in her absence.

(Sapphire finally learns of Ruby’s time before Agate.)

( _The great Ruby_.)

(Sapphire starts to hate Pearl, just a little.)

 

Then, a blink of an eye, and the mirrors are fading from Ruby’s eyes, all of Ruby’s lines sliding back into place.

(She is so much more beautiful than Sapphire ever imagined.)

 _Ruby_.

 _Sapphire_.

Garnet is born again.


	5. amethyst

Amethyst (amethyst) is born in the year 5,333 BCE.

She is over three centuries late, and is the last of her kind.

(Amethyst is born alone.)

 

Amethyst remains alone for a very long time.

(Longer than she likes to think about.)

She doesn’t leave because she doesn’t understand that it’s an option.

(She doesn’t grow because she doesn’t know that she should.)

 

She plays with rocks, and names them funny names so that she can laugh and be happy every time she sees them.

(She breaks one, once, and cries for days.)

 

She climbs atop the machines she does not know created her, dismantling some but not all of them, and then playing with the pieces.

She explores the holes of the brethren she does not know she once had, and plays hide and seek with herself.

She first summons her weapons out of boredom, and then spends a great deal of time destroying a great many things with them.

 

Then, after an indeterminate amount of time that Amethyst did not think to count, there is Pearl.

She is so very big to Amethyst's eyes, long and sharp and beautiful.

(Amethyst attacks her because she doesn’t know what else to do.)

 

She stops because something within her understands that she will never win.

(She runs and hides in the hole that is her hole, and, when Pearl comes in, Amethyst doesn’t try and stop her.)

 

Then there’s Rose ( _You are everything we were fighting for_ ) and Garnet (who looks at her with cold, trichromatic eyes), and Amethyst discovers something that fills the gaping hole that has always been in her chest.

(In the spire, Rose is always with Pearl, and Garnet is always with her lightning, but even in their absence, she can still feel their presence, and it is different than the wasteland she once called her home.)

 

Amethyst begins to play with the humans because she wants something that only she can do.

(Just like Garnet has her lightning and Pearl and Rose have—)

(Well, each other.)

She learns how to eat, and how to sleep, and how to do—other things.

They understand her when she speaks, but she learns the fiddling bits of their language anyway, and they smile when she speaks their language the way it is meant to be spoken.

(They adore her and she receives their adoration effortlessly, having already forgotten what it was like to be alone.)

 

When she shows off to the other gems, they alternately smile, look upon her softly, and look upon her with mild disdain.

(Rose call her wonderful a lot, and Pearl’s fingers always brush softly against her hair.)

(Garnet doesn’t do much of anything with her.)

When she eats in front of the other gems, Pearl’s expression contorts into disgust, and Amethyst loves her disgust because it is different.

(Because it is new.)

Then Rose decides she wants to eat, and Pearl tries to smile, but fails miserably.

(Amethyst loves her frozen expression even more.)

 

As time crawls forward (and the world is so new and large and wonderful), Amethyst learns more and more of the fiddling bits of humanity.

(She learns how to weave, and how to dance all by herself—)

(Pearl catches her dancing once, and colors and runs away—)

(How to do a number of other things that the humans don’t understand how she survives without.)

(A number of other things that neither she nor any of the other gems can comprehend the uses for.)

 

But then—

Then the humans start to die.

Slowly at first, but then more quickly.

(Always with replacements that are never quite the same as the originals.)

Amethyst finally understands the meanings off a great number of words she never understood before.

(She goes looking for Rose and Pearl, but finds Moonstone instead—)

(Who picks her up and rocks her while she cries.)

( _Shhh—_ )

( _It’s okay._ )

( _Everything’s going to be alright._ )

(It is the first time Amethyst realizes that she is being lied to—)

(And she runs away in frustration.)

 

It is Pearl who comes looking for her, finding her hidden in the bottom of the deepest sea trench, and fiddling with bits and pieces of deep sea animal.

_Come back home_ , Pearl says to her.

_Rose misses you_.

Pearl moves closer to her, and loops her arms under Amethyst, and begins to propel them towards the surface.

_Then why didn’t Rose come to look for me?_

_Rose misses you_.

(It is the first time Amethyst realizes that every word Pearl speaks is empty—)

(That it is how she says them that matters.)

 

Amethyst eventually returns to her humans—

Only to find that none of them remember her.

(That all of the ones she knew are long dead.)

Amethyst stops staying with a single tribe, and learns to wander.

(To not learn their names.)

 

Then, suddenly, there is a _thing_.

A thing that is large and horrible and—

(Something with a gem that her gem screams is _kin_.)

Pearl slaughters it without blinking.

(Amethyst learns Pearl has a new expression—cold and hard—and that, unlike all the other ones, she doesn’t like it.)

 

Rose starts to cry, Garnet frowns more than she usually does, and Amethyst does the only thing she knows how to do.

(She runs to Pearl.)

_Pearl, why—Pearl—_

(It does not once occur to her that she should not be running towards the gem that just ground her kin to powder.)

( _Shhh—_ )

( _It’s okay._ )

( _Everything’s going to be alright._ )

 

And then—and then Amethyst learns a great number of things she was better off not knowing.

(Pearl tells her these things with a blank, empty expression, as if she doesn't understand the point of the question.)

(Amethyst goes looking for Rose, who tells her that she is wonderful and perfect with far-off eyes that are no different from Pearl's.)

( _You are everything we were fighting for._ )

(Amethyst already knows the many ways in which Pearl and Rose are willing to lie, so she turns to the one gem she can trust—)

(The one gem who does not care enough for her to bother to lie.)

 

_You were built for war_ , Garnet tells her.

_There is no shame in that._

She turns away.

_Rose was, too._

(Amethyst hears the words Garnet doesn't say—)

( _Pearl and I were not_.)

 

Amethyst tries to find comfort in that, but finds herself unable.

(Every three months, they leave the spire, and Amethyst is forced to look upon the blood, death, and destruction that her kin leave in their wake.)

 

_Death._

(It is a concept the other gems still do not quite understand.)

(A concept Amethyst wishes she'd never learned the meaning of.)

 

Amethyst only ever bothered to learn this funeral rights of one tribe.

(Nothing more than carefully placed rocks.)

Amethyst stacks rocks until her fingers bleed.

 

Pearl finds her, one day, stacking rocks for a village whose death rites were undoubtedly different—but are now lost to so much blood and ash.

(There is no one to tell her how she is supposed to do it.)

Pearl's eyes, when she finds Amethyst, are—

Not like Amethyst remembers them being.

(They are too-pale.)

(Along with her skin, and the faint pink of her hair.)

(She looks so strikingly like a corpse that—)

_Rose misses you_ , Pearl says, in a voice that is not musical and wonderful like it is supposed to be.

_Come back home._

Pearl is a liar, just like she always has been.

When Amethyst does not respond, her voice calls out again.

_Rose misses you._

A pause.

_Come back home._

Amethyst looks up from her rocks, and meets Pearl's blank, too-pale stare.

Pearl opens her mouth again.

_Rose—_

_Okay._

Pearl stops, her mouth open, and stares at her.

She closes her mouth, then opens it again.

_Rose misses you._

_Come back home._

Pearl does not move forward to take Amethyst into her arms, but when Amethyst steps into her, she folds down, and curls around Amethyst.

_Shhh—_

_It’s okay._

_Everything’s going to be alright._

(Amethyst and Pearl stack rocks together.)

(Pearl's emotionless mask sometimes falters, and something approaching disdain shows through.)

(Amethyst is silently comforted that she is not completely empty.)

 

Time passes, and Pearl drifts further and further into herself.

(Her eyes, skin, and hair, all continue to fade—continuing until they are almost bleached white.)

They continue to stack stones for the dead.

(Every once in a while, they do not have to, and it is wonderful.)

 

Then, one day, Pearl returns from the top of the spire with eyes half-closed, and a gem that is lackluster.

She is leaning heavily on Garnet, and does not notice Amethyst’s presence.

(Amethyst dances two parts of the same dance.)

(Amethyst finally find an application to dancing alone.)

 

Garnet stares up into her new eyes, trichromatic orbs softening.

(Softening into an expression Amethyst did not know she had.)

_Oh, Amethyst_.

_Thank you._

Garnet places a warm hand against the cheek that is Amethyst's in all but name.

(Amethyst finally meets Ruby.)

(She meets Sapphire a moment later.)

 

Amethyst holds Pearl to her—

(Amethyst holds Pearl together—)

Until Garnet tells her that it's okay to let go.

(Garnet crouches down beside Amethyst—)

( _Thank you_.)

 

Then—

Then a great number of things happen.

Rose and Pearl return the land of the living.

(Both of them flushing with color, once more.)

Amethyst fights her kin, for the first time.

(It is large and massive, and so very, very much stronger than she is.)

Amethyst meets Moonstone, once again.

(She is just as beautiful and perfect as Amethyst remembers—)

(And her lies are just as kind.)

 

Amethyst returns to her humans, finally able to look upon her hands without seeing their blood decorating her fingers.

(Finally free from the endless stacking of stones.)

This time, she doesn't wander.

(This time, she learns their names.)

(This time, she learns their funeral rites.)

Life goes on.

 


	6. rose quartz

Rose Quartz (rose quartz) is born in the year 9,489 BCE.

She is a general, but only in name.

(Body large but too soft for the war she was born to wage.)

 

Rose is young when she first meets Pearl.

(Young enough that Pearl is the first Pearl Rose sets her eyes on, and among the first gems Rose ever sets her eyes on at all.)

Pearl is Rose's first companion.

(Rose does not know for a very long time that she is also Pearl's.)

 

Pearl is brilliant, but Rose does not notice—blind instead to a world where Pearl could be anything but always right.

(She does not notice the way Pearl's hands twitch in their first years together, altogether too joyous—too happy to be alive.)

(Too happy to be _together_.)

(They are still by the time Rose learns to pay attention.)

 

There are a great many other gems under Rose's command, and Rose loves them all.

(Equally, save one.)

_Look Pearl, isn't it wonderful?_

(She eventually notices how Pearl always pauses before speaking, and how her smiles are always just a little bit hollow.)

_Of course._

(Once she sees it, she cannot unsee it, no matter how much she may wish it so.)

 

Pearl is unfailingly obedient, always kneeling and bowing her head.

Rose thinks it is normal for a very long time, until she suddenly realizes it is not.

(For the first time, Rose feel the rage of a revolutionary—)

(Blind and heady, an end all to itself.)

 _Isn't it beautiful?_ she asks Pearl, looking nowhere but at her.

(Pearl raises her head, blue eyes looking at nothing but back at her, and responds with the only two words Rose ever seems to hear her say.)

_Of course—_

(Then for the first time, she continues.)

_Rose._

(Rose decides at that moment that she is a rose, and not a rose quartz.)

(No one ever seems to understand it, except for the one person who understood it from the start.)

 

The years pass, and Rose discovers life that is not in the shape of gem.

(She then kills it, because she doesn't realize that she has another choice.)

Pearl comforts her for the first time, speaking in her hollow, musical voice about love, life, and sacrifice.

(The richest planets always have previous inhabitants.)

(For a very long time, they are not sentient beings.)

(Until they are.)

 

Rose takes Pearl's words to heart, pledging herself to making the most out of the lives that they will be forced to take.

She makes grand declarations to the cold hard blackness of space, Pearl close by her side.

(She does not notice, at first, that Pearl is retreating away from her.)

(She does not notice, at all, that it is her words that are driving Pearl away—)

(Not until it is altogether too late to matter.)

 

_I’m sorry._

(Pearl's absence is so much more painful than Rose could possibly have predicted.)

_I don’t know what I did._

She kneels before Pearl for the first time, taking Pearl's tiny face between her own massive hands.

_Please, forgive me._

(Rose cries, for the first time.)

(Rose finally understands why it is that she loves Pearl so much more than everyone else who works by her side.)

_Shhh—_

_It’s okay._

_Everything’s going to be alright._

(Pearl touches Rose, for the first time, her hand soft against Rose’s cheek, her gem cool.)

(Her voice is not as hollow as it once was.)

 

Time passes.

Rose grows into her station while Pearl grows away from hers.

(She stops kneeling, quite as much as she used to.)

(She starts meeting Rose’s eyes, much more than she once did.)

(Her voice becomes rich, and full.)

 

After too-long of it bouncing around in her head, the words finally slip out from between her lips.

_My Pearl._

_You’re wonderful._

(Pearl smiles brighter than she ever has before, staring up at her like she's the whole world.)

Rose holds her tighter than she has ever held her before.

(They don't fuse, but only just.)

 

They find Earth.

It is everything every birthing general could ever hope for (sure to bear gems beyond number).

(It is everything Rose always wished didn’t exist.)

For the first time, Rose feels the despair of a revolutionary.

(Deep and all-consuming, an end all to itself.)

 

Rose is the general, but Pearl is her second in command.

While Rose dithers and wonders about what she will do, whether she is justified in doing it, Pearl makes preparations.

(Far more than Rose could have begun to comprehend—)

(For far more options than Rose ever knew she had.)

 

Rose does not make her decision fast enough.

(Or, perhaps, she makes the wrong one, and then changes her mind.)

 

The rebellion begins.

( _Why would I ever want to go home, if you're here?_ )

 

Leaned over battle plans, and Pearl's form unfurls into the shape it once was.

(The shape Rose can only barely remember it being.)

Small and delicate becomes long and and sharp.

(Less like spun glass, and more like sown steel.)

Rose realizes that her engineer is not the engineer she always believed her to be.

(In the darkness of the night, Rose holds Pearl while she cries.)

 

Two new gems emerge from the galaxy warp, wishing to join the rebellion.

(They accept them because they stand no chance alone.)

(Unfortunately, they also stand no chance together.)

 

Rose watches, across a table covered in maps that she has been given but does not understand, as three gems plan the battles of the rebellion.

(A new harmony is sharp and heady in the air.)

Rose watches, as Almandine is born.

(She then stares down at her hands, and doesn’t know what to think.)

 

The first battle comes.

(They win.)

Pearl returns from the battlefield, skin shining in all the colors of the rainbow.

(Rose finally realizes what she’s been missing.)

(She finally realizes why Pearl ran, all of those years ago.)

 

_I’m so sorry—_

_I never knew_.

(Pearl smiles with a grimace—)

(Having already forgiven her, all of those year ago.)

 

The war goes on.

( _Please, you’re better than this—_ )

With every battle, Pearl recedes a little away from her—

With every battle, Pearl recedes a little away from herself.

(Her eyes become as glass, her voice brittle and hollow, once more.)

 

Rose’s subordinates slowly begin to die.

(First slowly, and then very quickly.)

It weighs on her and weighs on her and weighs on her—

And then she finally breaks.

(Rose learns the power of her tears.)

 

Rose learns war.

She discovers the many offensive properties of her shield—

The viciousness of her beautiful gardens—

The simple power of a plain sword.

(Rose becomes the gem she was always meant to be.)

 

The first gem Rose kills is a moonstone.

(A moonstone that looks deep into Rose's eyes as her gem falls to pieces beneath Rose's sword.)

In the dark of the night, in the years between battles, she and Pearl hold each other against the dark emotions that threaten to rip them apart.

(Rose learns the guilt of a revolutionary—bleak and unending, an end all to itself.)

 

Then a great many things happen—

(Only one of them good—)

And a diaspore sent on a mission of death looks not upon Rose, but upon Pearl before being blasted to pieces.

(Rose feels the hate of a revolutionary.)

(Black and cold, an end all to itself.)

 

Rose's hate grows by the day, unsoothed by Pearl's hollow reassurances and Garnet's cold platitudes.

She looks into the eye of Homeworld's ambassador, three weeks later, and her hatred finally reaches its peak.

(The gem makes it all the way to Homeworld before Rose's hatred finally takes hold.)

(The first gem is left unharmed—)

(But only just.)

 

Negotiations come to an end.

(The Empire begins to a contemplate a more permanent solution.)

 

The war comes to a head.

(Garnet and Pearl's faces grow grimmer by the day.)

Halfway through their greatest battle, a sword is driven through Pearl’s chest—

And, half a second later, death pours from the sky above them like rain.

(Thousands of gems—reduced to ash in an instant.)

 

Pearl's gem falls five feet away.

(Rose’s shield is three feet wide.)

 

Rose screams.

She crumbles to her knees, and screams.

(The universe screams with her.)

Above her head, the shield she'd never asked for dutifully protects her from the death she brought upon them all.

 

Tears fall heavily from Rose's eyes, and Rose finally finds something her tears can't fix.

 _I'm sorry_ , she whispers into the damp ash.

( _Why would I ever want to go home, if you're here?_ )

_I'm so sorry._

Rose feels the regret of a revolutionary—

Futile and meaningless, an end all to itself.

(The world goes dark.)

 

The world stays dark, for a very long time.

(It does not stay dark forever.)

 

Rose wakes alone—

To the pitch darkness of night.

(She does not need to look around her to know that she is alone.)

(That the war is lost.)

 

She stays there, for a very long time.

(Head bowed over a featureless patch of ash that she instinctively understands is different from all the others—)

(Stewing in the unshakeable evidence of her own failure.)

The tears that fall futilely from her eyes are not healing tears.

(They are something entirely different.)

 

Then, after an indeterminably long time—

The wind blows, the sun shines just right—

And a pearl grows itself out of the ashes.

(Rose never notices that it then tries to grow itself into something else—)

(Too busy feeling something that is not shame, regret, and hatred.)

 _Pearl_.

 _Oh, Pearl_.

(Trapped beneath her bulk, its shape falters, and folds back in on itself.)

Pearl opens her eyes, once more.

(She is more beautiful than she has ever been.)

 


	7. moonstone

Moonstone (moonstone) is born at the first brush of Pearl and Rose’s melodies—

The first time their melodies harmonize with one another, and create something greater than either standing alone.

(She is born from a marriage of equals, and, for a very long time, she does not exist very much at all.)

 

Moonstone’s first emotion is wonder.

She is Rose’s hands wrapped around Pearl’s—Rose’s voice calling out against the silence—

_Oh, Pearl, isn’t it wonderful?_

She is the wonderful tangle of Rose and Pearl’s melodies in the singular instant that all of the cynicism in the soft sharpness of Pearl’s melody is burned away.

(She is Pearl’s momentary desire to cry out _Yes_.)

But then cynicism creeps back into Pearl’s melody, and she is gone.

 

Moonstone’s second emotion is affection.

She is Pearl’s unbowed head, Rose and Pearl’s shared gaze—

She is not Pearl’s demure _Of course_ , but rather—

She is Pearl’s bold declaration of _Rose_.

(She is Pearl’s fluttering melody—)

(Pearl’s desire to reciprocate that which she has been given.)

(She is _Rose’s_ desire to reciprocate that which Pearl gives her just by existing.)

She is both Pearl and Rose’s desire to say—

_You are so much more than you think you are—_

_So much better than all that you would compare yourself to._

But then Pearl’s head falls, subservient once again, and Moonstone is gone.

 

Moonstone’s third emotion is despair.

She is Rose’s horror, as she does her best not to think of all of the everything she has so willingly destroyed by her own hand—

She is Pearl’s bleak sympathy, knowing all that Rose is going through—

(Her sure knowledge that there is no easy fix.)

She is their desire to touch one another—

Their blind hope that it could fix everything, even if for only a moment.

(She is their hesitance, and restraint—their hands knitted together in their laps.)

She is Pearl’s halting, stuttering words, as she speaks about love, life and sacrifice.

(She is Rose, hanging on Pearl’s every word.)

Then Rose smiles and Pearl doesn’t, and she is gone.

 

And then—

_Shhh—_

_It’s okay._

_Everything’s going to be alright._

Moonstone is Pearl’s hand, pressed against Rose’s cheek—

She is Rose’s relief (Pearl’s twisting regret), and she is Rose relishing in the feel Pearl’s gem against her skin.

(Moonstone starts to be, more than she was before.)

(Moonstone starts to be, more than she is not.)

 

Years pass, and Moonstone grows stronger.

She is Rose’s growing confidence, Pearl’s growing autonomy—

She is—

_My Pearl._

_You’re wonderful_.

(She is the _I love you_ ’s that tug at their lips, unspoken.)

 

Later, when they find Earth, she is their shared despair, looking upon that which they both know will tear their entire world apart.

(She is Pearl’s silent hatred for the planet that dares to steal all that she has so carefully worked to attain.)

 

Then—

_Why would I ever want to go home, if you’re here?_

She is Rose’s bittersweet elation—

(Rose’s relief at knowing she will not be left alone—)

And she is Pearl’s silent acceptance—

(Pearl’s tired and unwavering devotion.)

The rebellion begins.

(Moonstone comes into being fully, and without exception.)

 

For the three years between the declaration of war and the first battle, Moonstone is more alive than she has ever been before—

For the first time, she is Rose’s fierce protectiveness.

For the first time, she is something more than Pearl’s unthinking devotion.

(For the first time, she is the line where there’s bodies meet as Rose holds Pearl’s shaking body close to her own—)

(Trying to keep her from shaking apart.)

 

But then the first battle of the war comes and goes, and Moonstone begins to die.

(She is Rose’s horror and Pearl’s bleak acceptance—)

(She is Rose’s worry and Pearl’s grim determination.)

The bonds tying Rose and Pearl together begin to break, and Moonstone starts to come apart at the seams.

 

For a short moment—

When Rose takes up her sword and her shield, and Pearl and Rose stand together as equals for the first time—

Moonstone is brilliantly alive, once again.

(She is Pearl’s soft contentment, Rose’s grim determination.)

(She is their brilliant fury and their shared patience.)

But then a moonstone crumbles around Rose’s sword, and she is gone, once more.

 

For the next six centuries, Moonstone exists only in fits and spurts.

(She exists primarily in the privacy of their own quarters, where they are temporarily allowed to bare their wounds—)

(Temporarily allowed to find comfort in one another.)

 

The war enters its final stages, and Moonstone exists less than she ever has before.

(She stops being that which lies between them when they lie together.)

(She stops existing very much at all.)

 

But then the final battle of the war comes—

And she is suddenly Rose’s screaming anguish—

Her deep and unending regret.

(Her _I’m sorry—I’m so sorry_.)

She is Rose’s shield, crumbling away into nothing.

 

After that, for a very, very long time, Moonstone does not exist.

(The world is nothing but blackness.)

 

But then, with a sudden explosion of feeling, she suddenly does, once more.

(She is Rose’s all-consuming despair, and desolation—)

(Rose’s desperate _I need you, please—_ )

(Rose’s _Come back to me_ , whispered into ash that refuses to stir with life.)

 

One and a half centuries later, she is once more Pearl’s grim determination, digging her fingers into the dividing line between the dead and the living and dragging herself back into existence.

(She is Rose’s surprise and then overwhelming relief—)

(Rose’s love and Rose’s hope, for the first time in an incredibly long time.)

She is momentarily Pearl’s ravenous hunger before—

_Pearl._

_Oh,_ Pearl.

Before she is instead the line where their bodies meet, once more.

(That which lies between them when they lie together, once more)

 

Five minutes later, she is Rose’s hopeless affection—

(Rose’s first _I love you_.)

And then—

And then she just is, for the first time.

(The world is bright and beautiful and wonderful—)

(Everything she always knew it would be.)

 

Moonstone opens her eyes, and when she turns her gaze down to her right hand, it is empty.

(When she turns her gaze to the ruby and sapphire by her side—they are whole.)

Just as it was always meant to be.

(Moonstone sings and dances in the ashes of the dead.)

 

After that, Moonstone returns to existence fully, and without exception.

(Two months later, she is Pearl’s first stuttering _I love you_.)

(Two months later, she is the heart Rose should not have but has regardless, fluttering in excitement.)

(After that, Moonstone _is_ almost as often as she is _not_.)

 

The first gem Moonstone ever meets is _Amethyst_.

(Small and soft and warm—)

(Everything Moonstone knew she would be.)

But Amethyst is crying, tears pouring from her eyes, so Moonstone gathers her up in her arms and tells her that which she knows to be true.

( _It's all going to be alright._ )

But then Amethyst is suddenly pushing her away, screaming at her for reasons she does not understand—

And then she is gone.

(There is suddenly great friction within her—)

(And she is torn violently in two.)

 

Amethyst comes back, still small and soft and warm—

(Still small and soft and petulant—)

And Moonstone is so incredibly happy to have her back.

(Moonstone gathers Amethyst up in her arms and whispers apologies and declarations of love into her hair.)

(This time, Amethyst knots her fingers in Moonstone’s hair, and doesn’t push her away.)

 

All is well (all is perfect) until Moonstone (and it is _Moonstone_ , and not anyone else) stumbles upon the first monster created by her hand.

(Moonstone can do nothing but stare at it as it crashes down upon her and splits her into her components—)

(Because of them all, Moonstone is the least prepared for violence.)

 

After that—

(After Moonstone is Pearl's spear, driving through the monster's gem—)

(After Moonstone is Rose's desperate, bitter pleas to the heavens)—

Moonstone doesn't start to die.

(No.)

She just gets sick.

(Horribly, horribly sick.)

At the end of the day, Rose and Pearl return to one another (Rose and Pearl return to _her_ ), and she holds them together.

(Even when all they truly want is to be allowed to fall apart.)

 

Three centuries later, all is set to rights once more (Almandine finally sees that which Garnet has been unable)—

And Moonstone feels the electric brush of Garnet’s harmony, for the first time.

(Their harmonies tangle briefly together, and a new harmony that never exists long enough to be given a name comes briefly into existence, before winking out, once more.)

 

Time passes.

Moonstone stops being Rose’s blinding hope, and starts being Rose’s encroaching depression.

(Moonstone starts to be Rose’s single reason for existing.)

Moonstone never learns to fight.

(No gem monsters ever fall by her hand.)

 

Then—

Suddenly, there is Greg.

(A round, human-shaped ball of softness and hair—)

(Who is so filled with hope it shines all around him—)

(Blinding to watch.)

For the first time, Moonstone falls in love.

(For the first time, Moonstone finally understands what Rose and Pearl see in one another—)

(For the first time, Moonstone finally understands how she came into being.)

 

The haze of Rose’s depression breaks, and mania crashes down upon her.

(Moonstone is Rose’s silent companion as she desperately plots in the dark of night—)

Moonstone is Rose’s silent companion when she resolves to end her own life.

(When Rose resolves to end _Moonstone’s_ life.)

 

It is a secret, but not for very long.

(Rose is not a good liar, and neither Greg nor Pearl are particularly stupid.)

 

For the first time, Moonstone is Pearl's betrayal, her horrified rage.

(For what is not even close to the first time, Moonstone is Rose's creeping guilt.)

_How could you do this to me?_

_I—_

_How could you do this to_ us _?_

( _How could you do this to_ Moonstone.)

For an instant, Pearl is eye to eye with Rose, her pale blue eyes gleaming with the all of the madness of the weeping angel.

But then Pearl is herself, once more.

For the first time, Moonstone is Pearl, walking away.

(Moonstone fizzles, but does not fade.)

 

Three weeks later, Moonstone is Rose’s desperate pleadings—

_I’m begging you, please—_

_Don’t make me do this alone._

Three weeks later, Moonstone is Pearl’s tired acceptance.

(Her unwavering devotion.)

Moonstone comes into being, for the last time.

 

Seven months later, Moonstone is Rose—

Trying to keep her body from wiping Steven from existence.

Seven months later, Moonstone is Pearl—

Doing her best to not think of how easy it would be to make Rose slip.

(Seven months later, Moonstone is Steven Universe—)

(A silent ball of too many melodies to count.)

 

Two days after that, Steven Universe (Steven Universe) screams out his first cry.

(Two days after that, Rose Quartz takes her last breath.)

Moonstone dies.

(Moonstone is born again.)

 


End file.
